My Debts
by sparkybitterness
Summary: Roy-centic on Roy's debts to different people over his life. What does he owe to people? A little OC, but it's not horrible.


A/N: I've been working on this forever. This just suddenly came to me and I finally felt compelled to sit down and write it all out. I know the Archer debt seems a little crazy, but I felt it almost necessary to but that in. Roy seems a little out of character for me, but he's reflecting in on his life as a debtor.

Disclaimer: I don't own Roy Mustang or any other of these characters. I don't even own Fullmetal Alchemist looks down and sobs

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I can only owe some much too so many different people. Right now, I have a few debts so high, I can't begin to imagine how to try to repay them. No, they are not card games or my tab down at the bar. Those can easily be paid with money. These debts cannot be paid with money, but with something much higher than that. These debts have made me who I am. These debts will probably kill me, but even that, I think, cannot be enough.

I am indebted to Maes Hughes. He taught me friendship to its fullest. He was always there to pull out a picture of his brilliant family-the family I'd swore I never wanted, but secretly did-and wave it in front of your nose. No, he never meant to be rude (actually, he probably did). He loved his family so much. There never was such a deserving man. To this day, I still think it's my fault he died. Hawkeye tells me it wasn't. I know better. I feel guilty that he's dead and I'm alive. I should have been with him. I'll be indebted to him forever for sticking his life on the line when it should've been me. He was a diamond in the rough, my best friend.

I owe my entire career and education to Hawkeye-sensei. He taught me the truths behind becoming an alchemist. It's not just a fancy title; it's a way of life. I may act as a careless alchemist, but it's a show. I can't disrespect Hawkeye-sensei in that way. He taught me everything I know. I know he would disapprove of my military career, but that's alright with me. We soft of worked it out before he died. I know he would disapprove of my involvement with the Ishbalan War. Still, I am trying to make it up to him. I swore to protect his only daughter and hopefully he can forgive me for some of my ways. I've done that job with anticipation to actually do a good job for him. The greatest gift he ever gave me though was that privilege of protecting his daughter, and for that, I cannot ever repay him.

Although I'd never admit this either, I owe a little bit to Edward and Alphonse Elric. I remembered what it was like to be that young again having them around. They taught me to cherish the good things in life, but overcome the hard ones. That family was the most important thing you can ever have, no matter what. Most notably, they taught me to keep looking back at the past, but don't get lost in it, like I do so often with alcohol. Carry on with life because there are some things you just can't change, but maybe you can correct them. That lesson finally hit me hard when I lost my eye.

I killed her parents, but Winry still had the courage to face me and attempt to confront me. She was brave and eventually forgave me. Winry Rockbell gave me the true meaning of bravery, courage, and forgiveness. How could she forgive a monster like me, I have no clue. Somehow, she managed it though. She made me more forgiving then I'd ever actually own up to. Forgiveness is a high blessing that only some people are given. There is nothing in the world that I can give her to settle that arrear.

Even though this sounds strange, I owe my vision to Frank Archer. I do not mean to thank him for shooting me in the eye. Unintentionally, he gave me the sight I needed. His intention was to kill me, but in a twisted way, he ended up saving me. It took me two years to figure that out. He saved me from myself in a painful way. He took my eye, but granted me a way to see my errors and what needed to change. I may be grateful for that, but I'm still glad Hawkeye killed him. He wasn't as much of a debt as my others, but that doesn't matter. There is no way to give him what he gave me.

My final debt is to my Lieutenant, Riza Hawkeye. She has given me so much, but taken so little. She gave me the ultimate endowment of companionship, protection, and love. She taught me that there is so much more than pointless one-night stands. She was there when I needed a friend after Maes died, there in the hospital, and there when I came back from the North. She cares so much about me that it scares me. I've always wanted to thank her, but have never found the right words. I owe her the night we took down the Fuehrer because she was there, even though she claimed she wasn't fast enough to save me. She's saved me in many more ways than she knows.

It's never been something I'm good at, repaying debts. But for these people, I just can't. The only things I can do are try and try again to make it up to them. These people made me who I am today, with risks and debts running so high, I'm surprised nearly all of us made it this far. I owe my entire being to most of these people, and that is a debt I can never repay.

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Reviews are totally loved. Otherwise, what's the point of reading? Heck, maybe I'll even take flames.


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